Inner Fear

"Ride to the silent shores and fly through the gardens of time
You will find your heaven
Your god had closed his eyes
Alone, free you are"

Juhani Palomäki 1997, the Year of Inner Fear ::: Forever Yours Marthus & Khopec - RIP Juhani

As night replaces day and wonders start their absolution
Rises deconstructive and inevitable lust
Expect no joy and pleasure, one awaits the other measure
From the knowledge of my generated past

Righteous! Out of my eyes to see one
Spirit! Deep in my flesh to feel one
Wonders! Something is out there, I’m for, now

When whispers trying to rebound
You hear the colours, see the sounds at once
The trembling does your soul apart
They’ll never get my inner art foreseen

Lepers with halos
Lepers with halos

I must enthrone myself through burden of the years
Lepers with halos Lepers with halos
When the sadness has to deal with other deeds

For I am nothing but inventor of my shell
For Burden of grief is so fragile to re-burn the hell
For I exist, hail the fear proclamation

Righteous! Telling the lies to be one
Spirit! Never allow one being gone
Wonders! Something is out there, I’m for, now

And whispers trying to rebound
You hear the colours, see the sounds at once
The trembling does your soul apart
They’ll never get my inner art foreseen

For I’ll do nothing to destroy that perfect shell
For Burden of grief is so fragile to re-burn the hell
For I exist, hail the fear proclamation

It’s done by now! Apparently, sleeping
Rise up like the morning without the dawn
Just breathe somehow and your heart could start beating
Shine on like the glory without the sun

When light is melting till last solid seed
And shadows start to reign my tiny world

Waiting for the splendid horror
Sacrificing consciousness I bear
I don’t need no fading world
Just visions, whispers in the air

They unite, unveiling the darkness
Acting so perfectly, feeding me well
Suddenly I’m comprehending the reason
Reason I’m left here to rot in this hell

And only shadows reign my tiny world
My restless dreams embracing them again

Waiting for the splendid horror
Dignity I’ve buried deep inside
I don’t need no false seduction
Devastating slowly in my mind

For the emptiness I’m conceived

Watching their creepy elaborate art
I’m torn asunder in motion
Over and over acquiring me
Collapsing the chances for me being free...

Once you are trapped
In such a deep and restless story
You will never forget
What it means collapsing for it

Imprisoned in forgotten dungeon
Never forget
I’m imprisoned in forgotten dungeon

Knee my life to thee
I’m thy trembling lord of trivial
Rip my heart of me
The signs of love no longer needed
Torn me into dust
The wind will catch my sense of living
Everlasting lust
The only air I’m merely breathing

Nailed will with your body’s thrill
Burning ground, fever that will kill

In her mighty affection I’m drown
Even shadows are afraid of her spawn
She rules her selfishness at once

Undressed to use my spirit
Her rigid passion heals it
I’m crumbing down when she’s above

Knee my life to thee
I’m thy trembling lord of trivial
Rip my heart of me
The signs of love no longer needed
Torn me into dust
The wind will catch my sense of living
Everlasting lust
The only air I’m merely breathing

In her mighty affection I’m drown
Even shadows are afraid of her spawn
My precious flesh’s no longer mine

Undressed to rape my spirit
Her rigid passion heals it
Her body’s covered with divine

Nothingness, finally, turned to obsessive belief

Flashing lights
The impulse strikes the frames again
Empty sights
Reanimating dreams away
My only patterns are the thoughts I ruin by myself
And watching blood – the motion that my soul obey

Wake the disease
It doesn’t hurt, the cure is so despiteful
Take it with ease

But preeminent agony - icons to pray
Send me the image before I awake

Endless pain
For I’ve been struggling through my way back home
In my veins
I can’t deny the blessings overcome
Crawling shadows are the beings we’re never able to detach
Watching blood - the pleasure I adore too much

Wake the disease
It doesn’t hurt, the cure is so despiteful Take it with ease

And preeminent agony, icons to pray
Send me the image before it’s too late

Nothingness, finally turned

It’s just a dream but I’m over you
Believing's so useless
Betrayal vision’s not coming true
Denial between us

These wounds you’ve granted me would not sustain the fight
Deprave my vision, while the script is staying even
Like inspiration fading, rising, coincide
They always let me breathe for living

It doesn’t hurt’ the cure is so despiteful
Take it with ease

And preeminent agony, icons to pray
Send me the image before I awake

My ability to clarify your hidden world
Never lets you feel addicted to the brave
Just another isolated psychic wisdom falls
Digging slowly perfect shelter for your grave

I am the perfectness of lies
Incarnated hell, rotting paradise

Drawing out attention from your ego-soul
Lighting up the promises of mine
Breathing desperation, frightening deception
Leaving all your fantasies behind

I’m all that scares the world
Adoption that brings anemia to Earth

I am the paradox of life
Incarnated hell, rotting paradise

Never find me hiding out away of grip
Inspiration for your shattered falling grace
Like the nightmare killing slowly your domain of sleep
Terrified emotions – make up for your face

Are you able to expose your inner fear?

Live for me, why don’t you see?
My presence’s so despised
Always feel that rush of me
I’ll crush your heart, being hypnotized

They say it’s just a rapid strike
Like the pain of burning
Its venomous affection kills with the tongues of loving

The pulse of your heart’s just a waste of time
Eternity was supposed to be mine
Adorable creature that never exists
Blind fold of devotion erases its sins

My venom like heaven covers you
So deep, beneath my flesh

It’s joining the feast; it’s so starving to death
Incredible lies cuts your very last breath
It’s like autumn that slightly absorbing your colors of dreams

You can’t just imagine its pretty disguise
It sees and it listens to the pain in your eyes
And there’s nothing that could violate the obsession to stop

They say it’s just a moment of joy
When the time stops running
Its merciless destruction crawls by the pawns of loving

And never gonna give you a chance

For your soul’s your burden
Ironic evolution falls recreating nothing

You can’t just imagine its pretty disguise
It sees and it listens to the pain in your eyes
And there’s nothing that could violate the obsession to stop

It’s joining the feast, it’s starving to death
Incredible lies cuts your very last breath
It’s like autumn that slightly absorbing your colors of dreams

Adorable creature that never existed
Blindfold of devotion erases its sins

They say it’s just an innocent flight
But your wings are burning
Addiction to the savior-light still exists in mourning

And never gonna let you arise
Upon your meaningless glory
Love is a poisonous cunt
The end of story

Love is a poisonous cunt

Never ever
Convince my soul’s endeavor
I’m dreaming of the falling from grace

One tries the weakness coming forth
Our sickness begs for more

Greed, lies of the wise
I swear to God, but is it here?!
Now, claim your prize
From light we hide our inner...

For the things we’ve done
The flesh won’t cover anyone

Greed, lies of the wise
What sorrow brings this moment?!
I’m condemned, inhumanized
We breathe each other’s torments

Find it back
We’re trying to remember what it means

As world comes tearing apart
We’re put to the test; we’re abused by the hollow
Our bleeding is near
Bleeding is near

Never ever
Convince my soul’s Endeavour
I’m leaving for the promise of faith

For the things we’ve done
The flesh won’t cover anyone

Find it back
We’re trying to remember how it feels

I saw world tearing apart
We’re put to the test, we’re abused by the hollow
Our ending is near
Ending is near

Out of the innocent sanity
Rushed out the widely, precious, entwined
Oh, individual vanity
Never reaches the endless of time

Reason of my lessons
Coming out for that
Feeling in your consciousness the sense of regret

And the embarrassed fall in different stream
They’re floating anxious to the universe
The spirit stands in front of oblivion, sinned
It never wanders free among the rest

Whispers are coming from the radiant well
The time stops running, it abandons the dwell
Let my newborn journey begin
God of immortals let my name begin

Reason of my lessons
Dying second time
Feeling in my consciousness the sense of divine

And the embarrassed fall in different stream
They’re floating anxious to the universe
The spirit stands in front oblivion, sinned
It never wanders free among the rest

We’ve lost confidence and cannot see the barriers
Denying knowledge of light and death
That question “WHY?!” saves our life from deep euphoria
Generation with a bullet in its head

We burn our dreaming in hell

And emptiness’s betraying me as well
Deaf–muteness of the sanctity
The rebellious no longer yell
They hear the secrets of mortality

That question “HOW?!” saves our life from euphoria
Generation with a tumor in its head

We stab our dreaming, we dwell

And emptiness’s dividing me as well
Deaf – muteness of the sanctity
The rebellious no longer yell
They know the secrets of mortality

Could everyone stop witnessing despair?!

We are exceptionally perfect, useless
Trying to inhale what is obscene

Refuse me thousand times
But, where’s your truth?

Out of mind
Preaching model
In my sights
One step closer
Paradise

Out of mind
Preaching model
In my sights
Secret’s holder
Paradise

False prophecies – foreseen and crumbled
You will see in all of the ugliest beliefs

So, emptiness’s betraying me again
Deaf – muteness of the sanctity
The rebellious no longer yell
They tell the secrets of mortality

Could everyone stop witnessing despair?!

We are exceptionally perfect, useless
Trying to inhale what is obscene

Refuse me thousand times
But where’s your truth?